Drunk santa's christmas buying guide

Santa is all liquored up and ready to hit the town! Suit by Shinesty Threads.

Christmas is upon us, and because Santa has been drinking and carrying on too much, he's just now getting to his list of great gifts for your favorite laker.  As with everything I recommend on this website, I have no affiliation with anyone (Santa is lonely!).  Lets get to it!

FLoaty pants

One of our favorite things from 2016 (read the review here), everyone will love wearing Floaty Pants, and other lakers passing by will definitely check you out and think "This guy/gal seems like fun, we should party with him/her."  No one puts on a pair of Floaty Pants and has a bad time.  Only $40, and available on Amazon Prime to be delivered to your door in 2 days.  They come in different sizes, colors, and designs, so pick up a few right here, and "Enjoy the party in your pants!" 

Cooler Can monthly

Cooler Can Montly is pretty much exactly as it sounds.  You sign someone up (or sign yourself up because you are a greedy bastard and want all the cool things), and they will mail you a random Koozie each month.  They will be funny, unique, and/or just from some local dive around the country.  Here are the three I received:

It's only $7 or less per month and you can sign up for 1, 3, 6, or 12 months.  So treat yo self or someone you love (or are related to).  Coolercanmonthly.com  Like I said, I have no affiliation with them, but you should leave em a note and tell them Rule The Lake sent you because "business reasons."

The ultimate ugly christmas outfit

 The boys over at Shinesty have nailed the Christmas vibe.  Their suits are only $99 (and they make other stuff).  Here's me in my "Bad Santa" suit.  I would advise you that the suit fabric is quite rigid, and the pants are narrow, so if you're a thigh guy or gal and like squats, your pants will be tight.  All of my suits are 46L and 36x32, however I popped the button on the pants (ok, maybe post surgery I'm not quite back to those exact sizes...but I'm pretty close, and they are still pretty rigid).  The suits are not cheaply made, and you will look awesome in one.  They also have outfits for you ladies as well, and their emails and texts are pretty funny. 

For santa's helper

If you didn't buy the Dog-On-Water Ramp featured on Murphy's Log, you're out of luck! They're sold out.  I'd check back again in February/March, or follow us on twitter or Instagram and I'll be sure to blast out a notice when they're available again. If you have a dog on the lake, you need it plain and simple.  As a consolation gift for your "big sweetie" (in dog voice), it's probably time you upgraded your pupper's life jacket.  Do that right here.

Sky's out, thigh's out

My wife already won Christmas with just one gift....the gift of a pair of Chubbies!  If you want to Rule The Lake, rocking the best pair of swim trunks you can buy will go a long way.  They sell more than just swim suits, but go ahead and buy some swim suits. Mention Rule The Lake for an extra 0% off because I have no affiliation with them...just mad respect.  Also business reasons yet to be determined...or explored...or understood.  Take my word on this, Chubbies are in.  Get some.

everyone loves a yeti

Yetis are awesome.  They work.  They look cool.  People who see you with one will think you're cool.  Plus Brad and Lisa two docks down have them, and you definitely can't let them show you up.  So stick it to Brad and Lisa, drink colder beverages, look cooler, buy a cooler, and up your lake rep with any and all things Yeti.  Don't sell yourself short with a knockoff, you rule the lake!

Search my product reviews for the rest

I know, I know, I know...I need to write way more reviews.  I have a list and I'll get to it....at some point. However, if I've actually written about something, it must be pretty great.  So go to my product review pages and buy those things.  I promise they are as good as I say they are, and they will make great gifts.  Plus everything is available on Amazon Prime, so it will be delivered in 2 days or less.  Don't have Amazon Prime?  Here is a handy dandy link for you to sign up (below), or sign up someone else as a gift.  Also get an Amazon Echo...it's amazing.

In closing, you still have time to get that perfect gift and win your Christmas. Although He is the reason for the season, it's still OK to give something awesome to the loved ones in your life.  Thanks for reading, tell your friends!

Merry Christmas!